A friend of mine resumed working, just a couple of days back. She is the associate director in a MNC and a mother of 1 month old. Everyone went berserk. How can she leave her a month old behind and resume working? Is she even a mother!!!
But when the chairman of Mahindra Group, Anand Mahindra helped in babysitting his grandson, it was then he realises the plight of working mother. The table turned over. He salutes and acknowledges their hardwork and “success that required much greater amount of effort than their male counterparts.”
I was reminded of Neha Dhupia who recently resumed working just after 10 days of giving birth. We have even seen instances where ladies walked into Parliament, be it in Australia or Canada, they worked while breastfeeding.
But why are we so obsessed with working mothers and if they should work or not? Why do not we even question once if the new father resumes his work after a day or two the child is born? He is also leaving his newborn behind. I am also a mother of 1 year old, and I also juggle between my jobs and baby.
But why do not we question the fathers?
Why is it always mother’s responsibility?
Why a lady is firstly seen as a mother then as working or housewife?
Do you even realize that staying at home with the child is ample load of work? But no, the moment we step out of our home to work, we are seen as working mother, wait, no, as careless mother. But being at home, handling household chores, taking care of the kid, makes us what… A stay-at-home mum who is not working.
I am not comparing the workloads of stay-at-home- mum or working mum, but I merely stating that we are working in our ways, and nobody has the right to relegate us to the household boundaries, just because we have a kid to take care of.
I have seen mothers, even I belong to this category where we burn ourselves to death thinking what sort of mothers we are who are leaving their kids behind for own career, studies. How ruthless we are, ignoring our little ones. But did you ever spare single thought on the fact, that on the other hand, fathers consider themselves more responsible to handle the finances? Weird, don’t they feel the responsibility of taking care the kids. Just manage the finances, and all is done for him. But did you even ask him once if he wishes to stay with the kid and play with him? Change his diaper. Feed him.
No. Because he has to be the breadearner even when he wishes to stay back with kid. There are times when he would be even scared to hold the newborn, stating that he might drop him. He is new to all this, you see! Wait! Are we mothers of Kaurvas!!!! Are we born equipped with the ability to handle kids? I wonder.
Why are men always babysitting or helping, but not “taking care” of kid?
Why are we explaining ourselves each and every time and to others. Just get out of this guilt zone. You are working for your kid and yourself.
Being a mother does not make you responsible to just nurture, tend and look after the kid, but if you two wish then you must share the workload. It’s not the sole responsibility of mother to tend or of father to earn. It can be vice versa as well.
Dear Dads, you are not doing a great work by changing the diaper or making the kid put to bed. That’s a part and parcel of having kid. Understand this. Man up and try to swap the positions with ladies, then you will understand their stance.
Ladies, grow up. Don’t ask for help. You two need to be clear that you both became parents and it’s your kid, not just of mother or father. So, divide the work, like you do in other workplace.
Dear Society, we really don’t care what you think. If you cannot be of any help, then don’t bother judging us.