Honesty is the best policy in any relationship. But to what extent does this stand true in a relationship? Time and again, we come and face to face with the situations when we have to lie. Here, compulsive liars are simply out of question.
There is a huge difference between deception and small lies. Agreed at time certain small lies do add upto cheating. But certain big lies like hiding about someone’s ill state from a loved one becomes necessary. So lies are necessary and justified in certain cases. Understand that cheating is a big no-no.
Pandora box opens when the female asks “How am I looking”. We know each time it’s simply not possible to look drop-dead gorgeous. Yet most of the guys refrain from negative comments. They lie just to see that dazzling smile on her face.
Another common instance is when they are asked about their whereabouts. Most of the time, we girls get to hear “just with friends” or “in a meeting”, but we know the truth, don’t we? No, I am not being snoopy, but we simply know you.
So let’s assume just for a moment that the guy bluntly says “You are looking fat today” or “What a horrendous attire it is”. What havoc it will create, damn!
Bigger blunder would be when the guy says, “I’m with a hot lady” (not just some friend). God bless the people then. Save his soul.
So we again stumble on the same intriguing question, how much of truth should be divulged. How much of lie is acceptable in a relationship…
Let’s have a look at “how much”…
- It is necessary to understand that trust is the basis of any relationship. So it’s not about “how much” basically, but about what are we hiding or telling lies about. And, yes! Hiding the truth is also equivalent to telling lies. But it’s all circumstantial.
- How about buying sometime by going procrastinator’s way. There are ample of times when you need to tell a lie just because you don’t know the exact situation. At those times, you can delay the ‘interrogation session’.
- Be honest, but not blunt. Telling her that she is looking fat might be blunt, but it can be helpful to her. So say it, but maybe you can make it pleasant by saying, “You are looking fat, but why don’t you wear this over. You will look splendid.” Even you can say, “you might be looking bit heavy, but what I love most is you, not your body”. Or “I might sound rude at this instance, but I care for you. So how about morning jogs together?”
- Yes we understand that there are times when you need to lie. You might tell a lie at that moment according to circumstances. But just be careful, that you tell your partner the truth later on and the reason why you lied. This will strengthen your bond to a great extent.
- Your partner need to accept the person you are and the way you are. So your honest opinions will surely pave a smooth road to you. While with lies, there will be curtains all around.
- How about you two give each other much required space. There are certain things that you two can clearly define as off-limits. This might be lead to suspicion initially. But as the relationship will brew stronger you yourself will start taking him/her to those “Trespassers not allowed” region.
Relationships are very delicate and your one lie can devastate it. Maybe it was your first lie to your partner, but what will happen when the other person start doubting everything on basis of that one.
Your partner surely knows you but suspicion can curdle it.
Every relationship is different, and you know the best about it. But always remember, one lie is the key to thousand cover up lies. Moreover that one lie, if major one can leave you devastated. So it’s better to be honest and keep the trust intact. But bit of dishonesty is also acceptable. Just cover it up nicely maybe with some help in household chores or a dinner in a restaurant, or something. So lie but with precaution 😉